What does one write on one's blog at 5:42 a.m. on a Sunday morning? More
importantly, why would one want or need to write a blog post at such a
Well, when one sets one's alarm for 7 a.m., hoping to get a good night's sleep the night prior to teaching a morning class that starts at 10:30 a.m. (which means leaving the house by 9 a.m. but preferably 8:45 a.m. for reasons one doesn't want to bother listing at this moment) but wakes up at 4:30 a.m. with "gastrointestinal issues" (and let's just leave it at that, allowing readers to use their imaginations), one finds oneself UP, bed made, coffee in hand, dishwasher now already loaded with dirty dishes that were in the sink when she woke up, staring zombie-eyed at the laptop screen.
By now (my how time flies when you are having fun in the cold bathroom) it is 5:42 a.m., and one knows that by exactly 10:30 a.m., six hours after waking at 4:30 a.m. and precisely at the moment when the class will come to an official "Okay! Let's get started!" one will be unable to muster a single cogent thought except for: "I need a nap. Oh god. I can't keep my eyes open a second longer. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck."
That is what one will be thinking while facing a room filled with 15 students all awaiting words of instruction and wisdom.
One will wish she were not thinking this thought, as she surveys the circle of faces. One will want to be the sharpest knife in the drawer. Because truly, the art of teaching means a lot to her. She wants to do it right. She cares. With every cell in her misbehaving body, she cares.
So. There you have it. Today's blog post. Time: 6:09 a.m. Brain already starting to feel half-baked. Thoughts that should be sparkling on the top of the sunlit pond are sinking to the bottom fast.
But heart has not yet thrown in the towel. It says, "Have faith. You made a commitment. The universe might help you out in some way that you least expect."